Mini-Naps: We Adore You

You arrived home smelling like Pantene Pro-V mixed with Moose-the-puppy and water-bowl drool. Tumbling across too-shiny hardwoods, we carried you to the backyard and your first sniffing session with Oskar.

You cried a bit. Then realized that your new big brother was just a gentle giant, super-excited to have an itsy-bitsy-but-soon-to-be-ginormous playpal.

You eat. And poop. And snooze -- but only in passionate fits. You disliked your crate, until we figured out you just wanted a perview of the bed. And ocassional reassurance throughout the night.

You're so-so about eating. Honestly, not sure we blame you. Watered-down puppy kibble can only be that appealing.

You love to chew. Luckily, you're a huge fan of focused energy: seemingly fine with chewtoys, UGG boots or flip-flops -- allowing us a few super-quick switch-er-oos.

Above all, you're insanely cute. Even Oskar admits that. Except when you're dragging Scooby across the floor. And peeing on his bed. Or biting his tail.

Fatty and Tubby

Our lives are about to change, completely. Tomorrow, at 2pm PST, at the end of a windy, dirt-covered, AWD-road, we pick up Otto. Or Tubby. Soon-to-be-brother of Oskar. Or Fatty.

Thinking ahead, we contacted the breeder for directions. Quite possibly, in the world of right-hand-turns and stop lights, this one takes the glittery cake:

"....please dont go by the google ones as you will end up about 50 miles off. same with mapquest... it really is easy from the ___ north to san luis obispo, take the highway ___ north to ___ exit. go through the town of ___, aprox 12 miles from san luis , before you come to ___ there will be a stop light on the freeway called ___ road/ it only turns right head west ___ miles up a hill there will be a lake on the left, then down the hill you will come to a right turn, ___ rd turns only to the right it is a very windy, narrow diert road, go 3 miles to a fork in the road stay left on ___ the other way is a dead end. one mile you will pass a white barn with a green roof and 3 horses in the field right past this are 7 mailboxes. this is our driveway, it only goes to the left, over the creek and straight up,, you will see avocados on the left keep going and stay t! o the right at another fork our home is at the very top... it is a 4 wheel drive only in the rain so let me know if the weather is bad and ill meet you at the mailboxes and drive you up.. dogs are out so drive slow... please.. katrina the adress is ___ rd.. cell phones do not work once you leave highway ___ at the stop light"

I'm predicting many future posts a la chocolate-lab-newfoundland escapades. Assuming, of course, that we don't miss the avocado trees.

Yearning for Punctuation

Dear [last name] [first name] [middle initial]

My experience in selling expired listings ,has shown me that 99.99% of all real estate agents out there market their listings passively. Do you know the difference between passive marketing and active marketing. If you still want to sell and you haven't relisted yet, I appreciate the opportunity to explain my plan.

Sincerely yours

[first name, uppercase] [last name, lowercase]
Realtor

Dear Malin:

I noticed your home came up on on the computer as an expired listing! Naturally, this time you will hire a powerful agent like myself to use a different approach to sell your home for the most money possible, right?

I would like to apply for the job of selling your home. All you need to do now is simply call me immediately to set an appointment so I can show you the techniques I used to sell many homes.

I look forward to hearing from you soon!

Sincerely yours,
[first name] [last name] [period]

Sometimes You're the Windshield ...

and sometimes you're the bug, and other observations from driving to South Lake Tahoe -- and back.

• Ninety-five percent of drivers would most likely benefit from a re-edification around basic rules of the road.
• Cows out to pasture appear to have a care-free existance, albeit short-lived.
• I'm in favor of a national policy mandating cleanliness in public restrooms -- or at least the option of functional soap dispensers.
• Highway 16, Nashville and X Country are the most compelling satellite radio options.
• If the car ahead of you is speeding, it's OK for you to do the same.
• Mud slides are unpredictable.
• However, the DOT frequently over-estimates road-clearing-times.
• Which is good news.
• Snow-capped mountains and year-round Christmas trees are addictively appealing.
• RV drivers are pretty gutsy.
• Eddie Rabbit rules.
• Relaxing weekend road trip essentials: glasses, cork screw, luxurious wine, iPod.
• Relaxing weekend road trip non-essential: 118 steps to the front door.
• Silver lining: super-quiet snooze time & breath-taking mornings.

Perk-Ville

Turns out that LA's City Council is considering incenting a few lucky peeps to live in the city. As many with little kids and kaboodles are opting for greener pastures -- and more reasonable debts -- those running the official show are evidently concerned that our badge-carrying friends might get stuck in traffc during an emergency.

I'm cool with that.

But can those of the non-gun-toting sort apply, too?

I promise to:

1. Spend less time in the car
2. Reduce my Element's pollution contribution
3. Make fancier meals -- possibly even a souffle or two

A compeltely viable proposal, if you ask me.

Hot Off The Press(es)

People are amazingly fascinating.

Additionally, everyone -- no matter how foreign or funky -- appears to have quirky je-ne-sais-quois that are especially elevated at garage sales.

Recent learnings:

1. Irons are in hot demand. So much so, that you might consider a black market resale business.
2. Pink-seam Seven jeans are worth about a buck.
3. Cedar-lined dog houses are lucrative for ChiHuaHuas.
4. Spoons are more popular than knives or forks.
5. Not everyone has read "The DaVinci Code."
6. "Seabiscuit" is too advanced for Elementary School book enthusiasts.
7. Garlic presses deserve intense scrutiny -- even when priced at 50 cents.
8. Marketing. It's all about marketing.
9. Candle holders aren't all they're stacked up to be.
10. When in doubt throw in a freebie or two.